An Original Humor Blog by Steven Fawcett
Have you ever been working on an assignment and stared fruitlessly for hours at a blank page as though you could use your mind cunning or some sort of deception to trick the answers off the page? Or have you, perchance, glared at your computer screen with a death gaze as though it had the sentence that eluded you, and the answer would be all yours if you could, perhaps by force, stare the answers out of the screen? Come to the Writing Center!
Have you ever researched and brainstormed, organized and crafted, revised and refined only to find your literary masterpiece was disorganized, confused, and confusing? Have you ever written a paper with flawless grammar, fluent transitions, and completely original claims that, for some reason, had become a succession of interesting but inconsequential information forced together without meaning or context? Come to the Writing Center!
Have you ever been a member of the indigenous peoples of Pandora whose sacred land was in danger of being destroyed by evil Earth Marines who wanted the massive supply of unobtainium located underneath? Well, then…we can’t really help you with that…and your life is remarkably similar to the plot of the movie Avatar. But if you also need help with thesis development we can totally help you with that. Come to the Writing Center!
Right now, perhaps you’re thinking to yourself, “Self,” (’cause that’s what you call yourself), “you’re a pretty good writer. You’ve never really struggled that much when writing a paper and you get pretty good grades. You don’t really need to go to the Writing Center.”
Well, I got sour news for you, Jack. The point of this blog is to help bring awareness and understanding about how excellent the Writing Center is as a resource. I want more than just understanding, I want overstanding. So, I’m gonna’ drop a knowledge bomb onto your brain; prepare for the mindsplosion: Literally everyone could use a second set of eyes to look at his or her paper! Boom! And if you happen to be some sort of medical anomaly that somehow has two complete sets of eyes on your body, chances are your four eyes still share only one brain and, therefore, you still need the Writing Center.
Good writers write good papers, but great writers are great because they utilize the resources available to them. The best writers are those who recognize that even the best paper ever written has room for improvement. The best writers view the writing process as a social act. This means engaging others collaboratively to expand, deepen, tighten, and further develop their ideas. In other words, great writers go to the Writing Center. For example, Ernest Hemingway and John Grisham have frequented the Writing Center while working on their books. Even individuals such as myself, who exude excellence so effortlessly and with such grace as to appear to be great almost by accident, need the wisdom and guidance of the Writing Center. Literally everyone could use a fresh approach to look at their paper (and contrary to the evidence in this blog post, I don’t lightly throw around the word literally).